Scrap Paper Poetry #9: Final Final Finally Finished

Final final finally finished:
My mind is numb, all brain waves diminished.
But the year is over and I can easily breathe;
Summer is here, a much needed reprieve.
For the next three months, I’m as free as a bird
And I won’t have to be forced to etch another word
Of a god awful essay or droll presentation,
I can start on my packing for summer vacation.
My hairs are a little grayer
And I’m now relying on Bayer,
But exams have been vanquished-
Final final finally finished.

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Well, another year has come to a close and another summer has approacheth’d. I don’t need any excuses for my fauxetry. My brain might now be a charred lump of coal after this past harrowing year, but that ain’t gonna stop me from trying to have a kick ass summer vacation. Fellow stressed out students – rejoice! 

Update: In Which the Student Apologizes for Falling Behind (Yet Again)

Normally, here is where I say “well golly gee, folks, long time no see” and then make a resolution against my better judgment to post more for you fine folks of the Interwebs.

(Everything except for the last six words is BS.) 

I’ve been gone awhile and, as per usual, my posting has been sporadic at best. My other blog has been receiving the majority of my attention, but I don’t even post with any regularity there either.

After this post, I’m going to disappear again. I could excuse myself because this is dead week and finals are going to follow shortly after, but you and I both know that if I really felt like updating, I’d certainly do it. Any student knows that watching paint dry can be a good enough excuse for procrastinating on homework and studying.

Who says boredom can’t be productive?

So I’m not going to whisper sweet nothings in your ear and give you caressing reassurances that I’ll stop misusing you. The simple truth is that my mind is mush and I need to rediscover my motivation for writing and vomiting my ideas for you all to read. Dear Reader, you deserve better. So here’s what I’m actually going to do:

– First, I’m going to find a pint of Ben and Jerry’s.

– Second, I’m going to make my way through the neglected shows in my DVR (Don’t worry, Leslie Knope, I’m coming!)

– Third, I’m going to sleep.

– Fourth, I’m going to sleep some more.

– Fifth, I’m just going to post when I’m going to post.

And that’s that. I have nothing more to say at the moment, except for I miss you guys and hope to chat with y’all more soon.

Cheers,

SOS

Dead Week: I’M DOING MY BEST(ish)

“I’M DOING MY BEST. A journal in which to prove that despite any indications to the contrary I am constantly working on myself and trying to become the very best me even though it’s a much slower and harder process than Oprah and Deepak would have me believe and while I would sometimes prefer just to swallow a pill or have a personality transplant I will keep plugging away at this infernal self-improvement thing until I’ve done so well I can come back in my next life as a golden retriever.”

One of those life philosophy/human condition themed journals you find in the non-book merchandise section of Barnes and Noble. Shallow as it might be, it still tickled my study-numbed funny bone.

I’ll be back with a proper blog post soon, I pinky swear.

For No One Can See Me and Live… Until YouTube

“Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.”

– Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

First of all, I am no man.

Second of all, I have no second point.

Well, folks, I’ve decided to take a step out of the shadows of anonymity and start making YouTube videos. To be honest, I have no clear reason or idea why. Do I want to expand my brand? Perhaps I’m an attention whore at heart. Maybe it has to do with daddy issues, abandonment issues, Ben & Jerry’s issues, etc. For whatever reason, I have a YouTube account now and I’ve posted my first personal video. I already had a few Richard Dawkins videos up, but I only just recently uploaded one where I show my face.

For now, I have no focus on my YouTube channel. All I know is that this blog will still be my primary outlet of [not so] creative expression. My YouTube channel will be updated even less frequently than this site is. For now, it’s still in the experimental stages. I was just really excited that I got a ukulele and I wanted to share it with the world because I have no friends. Just kidding. Not kidding. Just kidding…

So what did I choose to do for my video debut? Why, sing and play a Monty Python song on the ukulele, of course.

So subscribe to my YouTube channel stressingoutstudent and see the fears, worries, and screaming pathos in 3D*!

Bring it on, YouTube. Let’s see what you got for SOS.

*Not actually in 3D

The Good, the Bad, and th- Oh Dear God the Month’s Almost Over

What? How did this happen? Wasn’t Halloween just yesterday? Where did my jack-o-lanterns go?

Pretty damn good, if I say so myself.

This can’t be happening. I mean, midterms just happened, but they only just happened! And didn’t I just pass my 10,000 word mark on NaNo? Wait. Oh. I fell behind. Dammit.

According to the handy little stats chart, I’m supposed to reach 30,000 words by the end of today in order to finish my NaNo novel by the end of November 30th. Fu-u-u-u-u-udge me. The second week slump hit me hard, what with those silly things called “midterms” going on in the background. Turns out it’s hard to focus on writing a novel when you’re memorizing the difference between valid and invalid argumentative forms and writing code for a ridiculous program at the same time. I am unworthy of my Asian genes.

What I’ve been doing with NaNo so far is cranking out between 3,000 and 4,000 words a sitting and then letting my “novel” sit for two or three days and then crank out another 3,000 to 4,000 words. This does not a healthy sleep schedule make. Not that I was getting much sleep anyway, what with clips of “Whose Line Is It Anyway?” existing on the Internet. [And no, I haven’t yet seen the revival of “Whose Line”… and I’m not really looking forward to seeing my Ryan Stiles and Colin Mochrie as… old people.]

Oh despair, despair. Start ransacking my room for inspiration, pulling books from recently re-organized shelves, boiling pots upon pots of hot water for tea, shut off my Internet connection…

Maybe I won’t go quite that far. After all, “Whose Line” clips aren’t just going to watch themselves now, are they?

Stay strong fellow Wrimos – the end is nigh! And in other news, how’s life? I feel like we haven’t had much chance to chat lately? How is your day going? No, I’m not going through a mental breakdown. I genuinely want to know about how y’all are doing. Please excuse my rat nest hair and craptastically short update.